Worked most of the day on a children's book for my third term project. I don't think it's very good but turning it in will get me some extra points.
I have no intention of staying home tomorrow. I can look forward to dreading my entire Senior Year starting with my senior pictures.I certainly have no intention of being there on "Kiddie Day" next year. I really hope the next seven days just slide by easily. Just seven more schooldays and a three day weekend.
Meanwhile, less than four days until Wings Over America.
I've been thinking a lot lately about reality. About Constance. If only I knew what she was like. She seems quiet and smart. Clinging to those she knows, out of place in a crowd. Lonely? Is she as much like me as she seems? I saw a girl on KOJAK tonight who looked a little like her.
I also saw a fair but not good Bogie film and re-read Steve Gerber's "The Kid's Night Out." Then I started in on my Duck collection.
NOTES: Do other schools do this? "Kiddie Day" was another tradition in which Seniors came to school in diapers, short pants, with pacifiers, on tricycles, with lollipops, etc. All silliness I wanted nothing to do with in any way.
Seriously, I remember this crush on Constance but I recall it being pretty fleeting. Seems to me now like it probably lasted a full year beyond this.
"The Kid's Night Out" was a more-angsty-than-normal Steve Gerber story in the unfortunately titled GIANT-SIZE MAN-THING comic book. It was about an obese high school kid who gets bullied and dies, leaving behind his diary. Then the title character gets revenge for his death. I was NOT obese at this point except in my head. I had been a tad overweight in fifth grade and was ridiculed all year as the fat kid. Ever after, throughout school, I saw myself as the fat kid. Looking back now, even by sixth grade (above right), I was back to normal. By this point, having grown in height, I was almost skinny! But to my mind....I was still the class fat kid. That was why I didn't even try in Sports or with girls. Sigh...
It is funny how childhood taunts leave a lasting impression. For instance, my Google name, 'Big Mark' was given to me by an old co-worker. Now for me, 'big' is not a slight but meant to acknowledge my muscular build. But for so long during my adolescence and teen years, I felt 'undersized', as I am only 5'10. The reality still pales to the imagination when it comes to 'what I look like'.
ReplyDeleteAnywho, I am mostly over that because it is an insecurity rooted in fear... and as you well know, whatever knows fear burns at the Man-Things touch!!